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Man or Horse Part 2

If you haven’t read the first part, I’ll just say it: Men are like horses.

If you have read the first part, you already know that. So what do the girls from the riding stable do differently than the girls who call their best friend crying and complaining that all men are the same and that they will never find the right one? The girls from the riding stable come home in the evening after a day at work and an afternoon in the stable, dirty and smelling like a horse, to their well-trained husband, who looks even better than their girlfriends claim, and who holds the youngest of their 3 children in his arms while he prepares dinner in the kitchen. Who passionately kisses the sweetheart on the mouth, who immediately starts telling about all the things that happened in the stable today, and whispers in her ear that later, when the children are in bed, he will take the most special care of the tired rider. Excuse me? That exists? Yes. By the hundreds, if not thousands. The riding girls spend most of their time in the stable, taking care of their horse as if it were the last of its kind and had to be saved from extinction. And their hottie at home supports the whole thing, too. Why? Because she probably treats him maybe 10 percent the way she treats her horse. Can’t we ask the horse girls how exactly they treat their horses? We don’t need to. I am one and I tell you how to treat a horse. It’s up to you to decide whether you want to treat your loved one the same way. Let’s start with very small steps. What gets lost over time in almost every relationship? The interest in each other, the willingness to do something for the other and the love that underlies both. But why? Perhaps because people take the other person for granted and no longer appreciate the things they do. And what do the girls in the stable do differently? Well, they go to the stable and do nothing, they sit down next to the stable box and look at their phone for hours or chat with their best friend. Of course they don’t. The riders go to the stable and have a precise plan of what they are going to do with their horse today. And they don’t just know what needs to be done today. They have made a plan that extends to the death of the horse and is carefully considered. And it’s going to be followed through. Period. Nothing is left to chance here. The horse is either bought already trained or schooled by yourself. Of course, it is also important why the horse was purchased in the first place: Is it a show horse or a leisure horse? Do you want to use it for jumping or dressage? With regard to the level of training, the age and the breed, an exact plan is now worked out, which is applied on a daily basis. Doyou have a bigger goal in your relationship? What do you want to achieve together with your partner? What do you both want to get better at individually and together? Do you work towards it every day and encourage each other to do so? Or do you complain about the small shortcomings and the things about your partner that you see as faults? When you see your husband in the morning when you wake up, do you caress his face and give him a kiss on his hairy mouth or his bearded mouth? Do you lovingly feed him or prepare his breakfast? Do you then check what he has planned for today and see how you can support him? And in the evening, do you discuss with him the goals you have set together for this week, and then decide what still needs to be done to achieve them? If the rider were to do as most women do, after her horse knocks over the water bucket, she would stand by, insult the horse, leave in a huff, and not show up at the barn all the next day. Have you ever experienced such a rider? The rider picks up the bucket, calms her horse down, and is happy that her horse didn’t step in the bucket and get hurt, too. Well, who can tell the difference? The rider does not relate the horse’s behavior to herself. She doesn’t take what the horse does personally. She can distinguish between acquired bad behavior and unskillful behavior. Once again for all beginners: Make a plan of what you want to achieve personally and also together with your man. It’s best to discuss this with him, because he is a part of your relationship. Think about the next steps that need to be taken. And very important, even more important than that is to start to understand that you don’t have an old nag in the house, but a thoroughbred horse, which has to be taken care of in the best possible way, because it is unique, very expensive and a privilege to own such an animal. And also because of the love for animals or even for men. By the way: Horses are not like men. Thank goodness.

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